As most of you know, my first love after my family, stand-up comedy, acting, hot showers, peanut butter cups, and shelled pistachio nuts is fiction writing. Since I was a little boy I always dreamed of being a writer or a ninja, but as you get older you realize how dangerous being a ninja would be and how tired you would get of wearing black, so I was left with the dream of being a writer. A long time ago I wrote a book called "The Bologna Diet" a book making fun of all the new diet and exercise fads, it sold over a million copies in this one dream I had where I had actually followed through with it. What happened truthfully was I wrote the book, got a few good bites from publishing companies, sent a few sample chapters, then discovered alcohol and I don't remember much else about why it never got published. I was very young and my tolerance was very low.
Anyway, I've been working on a new book for the past six months and the 1st draft is finished and currently in the hands of my editor. It's a short, funny non-fiction book called "The Two Minute Workout: 99 Solutions for Smaller Pants, Quicker Comebacks and Less Fake Smiles."
Here are six of the many things you will learn from this book:
1. What we can learn from convicted felons about weight loss
2. Why eating a cupcake may diffuse your sexual prowess
3. How donating to the Ku Klux Klan can help you with your weight loss goals.
4. Why you probably should not run more than 10 minutes
5. Why eating an entire cake once a week is good for you
6. The similarity between nose candy and actual candy.
If this topic sounds interesting to you, I am looking for four beta readers to give it a quick read and some feedback in exchange for a free advance copy of the book. (Full disclosure the book will most likely only be 99 cents on Kindle. I'll also send you a copy of my newest stand-up cd.) Email me at jamielissow@gmail.com if that sounds like something you would like to do. (UPDATE: I have all of my readers! Thanks!)
Through the editing process I found out that you are supposed to put only ONE space after a period. I've always put two spaces, but it turns out putting two spaces after a period ages you faster then using the phrase "you sound like a broken record." I've been trying to get the phrase "you sound like a song on repeat" but it doesn't seem to have the same pizazz. I think using the word "pizzazz" makes you appear even older.
Anyway, I've been working on a new book for the past six months and the 1st draft is finished and currently in the hands of my editor. It's a short, funny non-fiction book called "The Two Minute Workout: 99 Solutions for Smaller Pants, Quicker Comebacks and Less Fake Smiles."
Here are six of the many things you will learn from this book:
1. What we can learn from convicted felons about weight loss
2. Why eating a cupcake may diffuse your sexual prowess
3. How donating to the Ku Klux Klan can help you with your weight loss goals.
4. Why you probably should not run more than 10 minutes
5. Why eating an entire cake once a week is good for you
6. The similarity between nose candy and actual candy.
If this topic sounds interesting to you, I am looking for four beta readers to give it a quick read and some feedback in exchange for a free advance copy of the book. (Full disclosure the book will most likely only be 99 cents on Kindle. I'll also send you a copy of my newest stand-up cd.) Email me at jamielissow@gmail.com if that sounds like something you would like to do. (UPDATE: I have all of my readers! Thanks!)
Through the editing process I found out that you are supposed to put only ONE space after a period. I've always put two spaces, but it turns out putting two spaces after a period ages you faster then using the phrase "you sound like a broken record." I've been trying to get the phrase "you sound like a song on repeat" but it doesn't seem to have the same pizazz. I think using the word "pizzazz" makes you appear even older.
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